I am contemplating divorcing my spouse of 30 years. I've tri

eye4got's picture
[1335]

I am contemplating divorcing my spouse of 30 years. I've tried to leave several times but was too scared. He is a Narcissist (albeit undiagnosed) and was/is emotionally controlling and abusive. We've been to counseling and he has improved but my emotional scars from how he treated me and our children won't go away. I worry what he will do when I finally get up the nerve to see a lawyer and serve him with papers. It's this fear of him that keeps me here even though I am miserable. He takes my weaknesses and used them against me. Oh and my son is getting married in 7 weeks so I really don't want to make any big change before then

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Aug 21

You are definitely in my prayers for wisdom and guidance. My first husband would have nothing to do with counseling. He also had all the symptoms of a Narcissist. I was afraid and very depressed with him. He was physical, mentally and verbally abusive. To say this is a hard thing might be an understatement. I can give you a number that has helped me. It's a Focus on the Family number and they are very helpful in finding good counseling and directing people to the right kind of help in general. They really do care. 1-855-382-5433. I wish you the very best. I hope you find much peace and joy.

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eye4got's picture
[1335]
Aug 21

@Rose58 Thank you!

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eye4got's picture
[1335]
Aug 28

I have my consultation with the lawyer today. Excited and nervous at the same time. We just got back from a week long vacation. Why did we go away? I think it's because he's grasping for straws. Although he made a comment before we left that it may be our "last one". He's so dramatic. As if he can pull on my heartstrings anymore. Surprisingly we actually had a very nice week because I had to promise HIM that there would be no fights. As if everything is MY fault. I was on my best behavior and basically yessed him to death. My brother and his wife joined us. We got back and of course he went after me as I was trying to help him find the parking ramp exit at the airport. Apparently I "didn't listen" to him. I was pointing out the exit sign because he was driving around saying "there HAS to be an exit on this side. I know there is one. " UGH! "Well I guess vacation is over" was his comment. Funny thing is these comments used to send me to the moon. I'm half checked out now so they just roll down my back. I wish I could fast forward to next year. Things will be so different.

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