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Feeling angry. Thought I had worked through things with my

[2075]

Feeling angry. Thought I had worked through things with my STBX, even the financial issues in the separation agreement. Suddenly asks for another 500 a month here, another thousand there, all of a sudden she's wanting what adds up to be over 50% of my income. Justifies this as "balancing" our incomes and to make up for her wanting to decrease her work hours to have more time with the kids. This in addition to letting her keep a significant amount that she had stashed in a separate account (the majority of our joint savings...I made the bulk of the income but allowed her to manage our finances over the past 20 years).

She's the one who demanded the separation / divorce because she just never felt a connection with me. Nothing I did wrong other than her deciding I was never the right guy. When I pushed back on the amounts, she accuses me of having wanted out of the marriage just as much as her. She tried to leave me twice over the past 20 years to go to her old boyfriend, andI fought for our marriage and stood by her through the years despite having a less than perfect relationship. I walked away from the military 8 years from retirement, then left a really well paying civilian job and moved to her hometown in another country where I have no family or any ties beyond the job I took when we moved.

Absolutely fuming.

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[2075]
Jan 22

@Barb4514 Depends on the week. Typical might be 6am-1pm on Monday, 11a-7p tuesday, 10p-7a Wednesday, off Thursday and Friday, then 8a-5p Saturday, 10p-7a Sunday. Rotating shifts, the only constants are that I fence off Mon/Wed evenings to coach my younger daughter's soccer teams and I book specific weekends off when we have games (have to travel 4-5 hours each way on game weekends).

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beth65's picture
[34815]
Jan 23

@alohabbq where do you draw the line and say it's ok to divorce?

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[545]
Jan 23

@Barb4514 good question when and where do you draw the line to divorce. It's a case by case basis, and depends on each person and how much stamina and perseverance and patience they have to stay the course and work it out. Forgive and forgive, forgive quickly, trust takes longer and has to be rebuilt. Divorce in a general sense, if there is physical abuse, rape and other forms of abuse, with no efforts of remorse or repentance, then yes, divorce in the extreme case. Helps, or need more explanation?

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