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So I am at a prayer retreat through my church and my pastor

Iristoiris's picture

So I am at a prayer retreat through my church and my pastor (who married my stbx and I) said, “Well, I’m glad I didn’t change your [last] name in my phone...” (He’s a bit of a jokester lol) and I said, “Well, I was telling my co-walker the other day tht next time, I’m not changing it!” And he said, “Next time, you will be happy to change it.” It just kind of hit me. He went through the same thing I am - as a a young pastor, over 30 years ago. His second wife is his steadfast. Gave me confidence that if I get my head straight this time and don’t try to run my own show, there’s going to be joy after the sorrow. I think he feels like he should have been more bold in counseling us prior to marriage, as he knew my stbx was answering the questions right, but had a feeling something wasn’t right. I told him I hope he’s not beating himself up about that. Considering I don’t know that I’d be at the place I am spiritually without this heartbreak, maybe I just had to learn the hard way. Anyway, a little laugh and hopefully encouragement to you all... this isn’t the end... Keep trucking forward!

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Dec 4

Sad thing is... looking back... I probably should have 'run' years ago... but I held on in there, because I loved him, because of my marriage vows, because he was a great husband at various points in our marriage and because I thought I was enough for him... obviously not !

eddie1975's picture
Dec 4

I think the same exact way when I read "I don’t know that I’d be at the place I am spiritually without this heartbreak." I'm afraid I'd be in the same lifestyle I was during marriage which was bad. In so many ways I'm much better off now. My ex though, she drinks all the time and is alone most of the time. Last night all kids were with me and she was alone in our big house (that she still needs to get my name off of.) I hope something happens for her to make a spiritual breakthrough too. It's sad that we had to be hit on the head like this to "wake up."

Dec 5

I LOVE your hope!!! Such a great place to be in. There is always joy following the sorrow. And you know what? You let God take care of it for you, it will be okay. So amazing! And so glad that your painful experience is bringing you such insight, and healing. HUGS!!!!


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