Last week I discovered that STBX hacked my email and deleted

JCAL's picture

Last week I discovered that STBX hacked my email and deleted all evidence I had against him. I also suspect that he set up my email account to forward certain email to him so he can monitor what I am doing. I was absolutely furious and shocked. Fortunately I have a close friend who is an IT security expert and is going to come secure my network tonight. But what is wrong with STBX? Unfortunately my state is a no fault divorce state so no matter how many affairs STBX had I can't hold him legally responsible. Which means violating my privacy like that accomplishes nothing for him but a sense of control over me. But for me, I feel violated in a sense. I can't get on my email or internet without wondering if he is seeing it. I had to go to a neighbor's house to create a new and secure email on her network to communicate with my attorney. I felt so stupid going to her. It was so embarrassing. When I first found out I was so angry but now I am so sad and hurt that he would continue to be so selfish. I am sitting at work, posting this from the work network, and feel like crying. Wondering how I didn't see the kind of person he is and wondering what else he will do to protect himself. I was hoping to avoid hiring an attorney and save money but clearly I can't trust him to do what is best for me. I also found out that he lied to me about the divorce filing. He claimed that he never gave permission for the attorney he spoke with to file the papers after he moved out, but when my attorney looked up the Petition he saw that the divorce was filed before STBX even moved out of the house, at a time period when STBX claims he hadn't spoken with his attorney in over a month. I keep discovering lie after lie, it is never ending. I can't believe my life has come to this. I am feeling so low today. I preferred feeling angry, at least that gave me a feeling of strength. Right now I feel weak and defenseless.

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Jul 11

@JCAL that is very good news. Please transfer everything to a new mail account and set strong privacy. Maybe like a code authentication sent on your phone if you need to login. I did the same. I had all the evidence and i created a separate account with enhanced security.

Bee4bdn's picture
Jul 11

Sociopaths/ psychopaths fear exposure so do be careful. I believe this was a Narc control move. Like a jab. He probably thought it was funny. Once you start dating again this guy could become even worse. The OW hacked into his account and it took me awhile to get it out of there so in the meantime I installed security cameras and started locking the back gate.

Jul 17

It’s unfortunate you had and still must deal with mistrust and lies in your life. But we know that in the end, we are held accountable only to what we’ve done in our life. And not for what others do in theirs. When we live life with truth and stand up for what is true, we have nothing to be afraid of. I hope that you can soon live all that is good and true. Take care.


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