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Im at my lowest right now. I'm trying really hard but everyt

Im at my lowest right now. I'm trying really hard but everything is so overwhelming. My vehicle went down im sitting here crying. I have tried everything i can think of. My bf n i aren't even intimate anymore

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[5065]
Aug 16

Help yourself first then help those that can be helped. Those on street drugs will not get off street drugs until they run out of other peoples money. They will beg and steal for the habit, starve, harm and even kill, contract disease for it and they will die for it. They develop blinders. Drugs change their thinking some partially forever some temporary for long periods of time perhaps years. I have held the hands of men passing away because they ate a bottle of aspirin. Another because they drank alcohol and took morphine till his kidneys and liver failed and his lungs filled with water. The question is do you want to be happy? In my own family of origin my mother fueled my brothers habit thinking she was providing food and shelter and that he was only suffering from a mental emotional issue. Unbeknownst to her I had to go to the hospital 3 times when he od. After mother died he begged me not to let the state handle his monies thinking he could use me the same way as mom. "Okay buster but it is going to be this way, once a week I pick you up at board and care, I pay them your rent, I take you shopping, we eat somewhere go to a park, ocean, bookstore whatever then I take you back. I leave you with 10 bucks till next week, deal or no deal?" "ah, ah, ah, let me think, ah okay Dan," Well after about a year he was becoming the brother I knew 30 years earlier. However he was going about 5 miles away to a park. Laying in the sun all day till someone came by and sold him mj then later that person would sell him heavier drugs on credit, they were laced with all kinds of crap. Unfortunately laying in the sun gave him a aggressive case of skin cancer. You realize I have made this story quite a bit shorter. For ten lousy bucks a month, in less then 2 yeas he died. I went to the sheriff about the park the counties's social department about first hand help getting him to the doctors, dah dah dah dah. Much much more to the story. I miss him greatly I see him in the mirror when I shave. I know your anguish, However in all honesty, I have been to the board and care homes in our county over the years. These clients, all God's creatures will if inclined and easily so find away to "do." Some I have known to recover but too many just fuel a system. So back to my very first statement because you are here and honesty is really the best policy. Wishing you the very very best future! You can't go wrong if you think of your own health you have a responsibility for that it came with your soul.

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It is understandable for the way you feel. Let me tell you that you are important, valuable and a person of dignity and worth of fighting for. It is understandable the way that you feel for what you are saying here. I hope that you are able to get your car fix. Please do not allow that these things overwhelm you. These things sometimes happen when we least expected. But let me tell you my friend that you have a purpose in life. Maybe it can sound like a cliché however things happen for a reason. And I know from my experiences that sometimes we do not know how to handle suffering. Suffering is neither good nor bad. And if we embrace it we can allow our transformation into a better person. In spite of this situation let me tell you that you are a person of worth of dignity. It is understandable for the way you are feeling right now. However, have you thought of seeking counseling or therapy to help you to conquer and overcome your anxiety and depression? Counseling can help you with treatment to overcome the root of your depression and anxiety. Counseling or therapy works through things like this. You are valuable and worthy of fighting for. This list –ly are extremely important for you are going through: https://list.ly/list/1CE4-looking-up-from-the-stubborn-darkness. Do not be discourage! Hang it there! Have you considered finding groups such as volunteering in charitable works, social groups that share hobbies or recreational events, adult groups from church, etc. that help you get your mind of your suffering and help to the needy. So you are not alone! I hope this helps. Sending you hugs. I will keep you in my prayers, my friend.

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[3500]
Aug 20

@graceforeverandever. Thank you. I appreciate the kind words. Im just at a bad spot right now. My bf n i have a tremendous amt of problems right now. He is stepping up to the plate. I help him as much as i can. We do work well together. My truck went doan again n this time its major. I did his laundry for him n he was very appreciative of that. It's been awhile that he n i have done anything due to health concerns with him. Its very frustrating when u want to b intimate but can't. Im just lost n so is he.

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