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I woke up this morning an hour before my alarm with just anx

I woke up this morning an hour before my alarm with just anxiety. I started my new job 3 months ago and every Monday I get the same anxiety.. I'm also dealing with other personal things too. I feel like I've battled with depression my whole life. It kept me in wrong relationships and it's cleared my judgement for future decisions. I have a lot of self-esteem issues. I suffered from acne my whole life and even though I don't really breakout now, I have the scars to remind me what I went through. When I look in the mirror I only see my flaws. I don't want to be this way. I try telling myself everyday positive things. I'm even reading self-help books to try and guide me. It is not easy trying to re-program your thoughts. Does anyone have any advice on what I can do to love myself. I have attachment issues and so whenever I meet a guy I tend to be very clingy, which ends up resulting in me being hurt. I'm just tired of living this life. I want to be happy. I truly believe in law of attraction and frequencies but why is it so hard for me.. These negative thoughts sneak back in and take over.

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[340]
Sep 11

Thank you so much for your kind words, it really means so much! Monday's are not even different from the rest of the week to be honest. I don't know if it's because I'm starting a fresh week but I tend to get most of my anxiety on Mondays! I have a dermatologist that I see who specializes in acne. She referred me to a clinic that does lazar for my acne scars but the only issue is that it's so expensive.. The funds are not that available to me as of right now. I'm just trying to use natural remedies like rose hip seed oil and witch hazel toner that can help minimize the appearance of scars. I know it's a mental battle because even my cousin tells me my skin isn't that bad but I see different when I look in the mirror. I have a lot more work to do when it comes to how I perceive myself but I'm not giving up. It means a lot that you've acknowledge the insight that I have because I'm genuinely trying. As of right, now I'm just going to the gym daily & trying to eat healthier as all of that makes me feel better. But you know how it goes... There are some good days and some bad.. I'm just trying to repeat positive things in my mind in hopes that one day those thoughts will come natural and I won't even have to think twice.

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[1305]
Sep 12

You are so welcome @isabellem!

Sundays used to be my day of anxiousness. I would wake up already projecting myself into Monday! Nothing bad would happen in particular but there was that sense of "man, I have to do this all over again?" I would freak out all day Sunday and literally only have 1 day of real rest, Saturday.
I allowed my mind and underlying worries to cheat me out of a day off every weekend. Honestly, redirecting my focus away from myself to others and how I could be of service was a tool I used to change my perspective. Perspective changes things.

Oh yes, I know....treatments are expensive, even home remedies are expensive! I use Rose Hip Seed Oil to this day and the pure stuff is costly. The right facial soap helps immensely too. One of the least expensive and what I found to be best treatments is actually affordable;
https://www.amazon.com/MD-Health-Indian-Healing-Clay/dp/B07NGHQMKS/ref=sr_1_1_sspa?hvadid=77859220434531&hvbmt=be&hvdev=c&hvqmt=e&keywords=indian+clay+healing+mask&qid=1568303057&sr=8-1-spons&psc=1&spLa=ZW5jcnlwdGVkUXVhbGlmaWVyPUExU0lKRTBNWDRTSVIyJmVuY3J5cHRlZElkPUEwMTQxOTIyMzNDR0dIVUhTRDg4UyZlbmNyeXB0ZWRBZElkPUExMDMxMjQ0MlVJVU9TV1VHTFQ3SiZ3aWRnZXROYW1lPXNwX2F0ZiZhY3Rpb249Y2xpY2tSZWRpcmVjdCZkb05vdExvZ0NsaWNrPXRydWU=

They sell it at the Vitamin Shoppe too. I mix it with apple cider vinegar.
YES!!!! Awesome! Going to the gym and healthy diet is fantastic!!!!
Isabellem, you are on the right track...there will always be good and bad days no matter what position we are in, it's about how we learn to manage the bad. One of the easiest ways to manage the bad is to KNOW the truth that good will come, it has before! You have managed it, will manage it, will be stronger because of those experiences, and even better will be a testimony to help others!

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[340]
Sep 12

Perspective definitely changes things and that is something I'm really trying to work on! I'm happy to hear you longer let your anxiousness disturb your Sunday's. I'm going to continue to try and not let my anxiety control me. I know it's going to take time...

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