I have battled depression all my life! I have been on EVERY

I have battled depression all my life! I have been on EVERY anti-depressant under the sun, seen over 20 "professionals" all to no avail.
I am not an optimist, nor a pessimist, I AM a realist!
To sum life up: We work, pay bills, watch loved ones pass away, stuff breaks, we see so much unfairness in our world-life-jobs and nothing we can do about it---then we die. WOW! What a thrill huh?
Plus I have ALWAYS hated myself---my physique, or lack thereof---never could gain muscle size and mass, despite working out-taking supplements, eating right, even did steroids-once-big mistake, I had all the side effects, but nothing positive.
I also battle hair loss---again, took Propecia, Minoxidil, etc...all to no avail....will not consider transplant, as I have read and seen the horror stories that go with it! It is gut wrenching to see men with full heads of hair, then look at myself....what a rip off/raw deal I got!
I have attempted ending it all--twice.....I will listen to ANY advice!!! As "professionals" with their CBT methods of focus on this not that---is like saying, you are burning up--literally by fire-but do not focus on that, instead, refocus on the three seconds a day somebody sprays a water gun on you---yeah, what a relief, huh??

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ANY advice on the issues I listed

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@Wayneac4Any advice at all on issues I listed...thanks for asking

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Do you have any family members that you are close too? I'm sorry you hate yourself I can remember feeling that way. As far as building muscle mass you might want to consider hiring a personal trainer for a few weeks they can set you up with a workout that works for you. There's a cap thats suppose to help with hair loss you might want to read up on that.

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