I am broken, completely broken. I have no hope, no passion a

Shopain's picture
[150]

I am broken, completely broken. I have no hope, no passion and no care. I dont have emotional support at all. I try to be better but that demons voice always pops up and says "Why bother?" I do not know how to change that.
My house is a mess, and I just dont care. I quit taking care of myself. I find myself thinking "why bother" far to often about anything and everything. I have no faith left in myself, in others or in God.
I think about death quite a lot, not about suicide ..mostly, more about just not being, just quiting..just stopping to exist. Wondering if anyone would even notice.
The ONLY thing that keeps me even partially sane is my dogs. They are not lovable type characters but the unconditional non-judging love they do have for me keeps me here. They are thee only thing I do take care of..
I ask myself what I want in life...and I come up with "blank"
I can not put into words how broken I am, How hopeless I feel..how lost...lonely. All I feel and have for a long time..years.. is that release from this mortal body is the only way out...
I am broken.

show more ⇓
Comment
 2
cchavez84's picture
[715]
Sep 13

I am so glad you have your pups! I can be so down... just wanting to get away from everything and my pup will jump up and look at me like I am the best person in the entire world. His smile ( yes he smiles ) at me can pull me out of a funk. We are given those blessings as reminders that even if it is just the dogs that keep us going, they love us unconditionally and need us. And we need them.

Reply
Holding On's picture
[135]
Sep 13

I know how you feel when you say you can't put it into words. It is well beyond words I know. God and much else is dead for me too. But another day I got to see the sunrise. You should too tomorrow, just thing of one, one reason. Doesn't have to be a good one, or even make sense today. I have no one either, I always think it a bit funny when a medical professional says,,,who is your support? I always say I got none. I does not dawn on them. It is so dark we don't speak of it. Make it another day for just one reason.

Reply

Login or Register

You are visiting Support Groups as an anonymous user.

Please consider joining our community and gain access to additional features by

registering or logging into your account