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I am brand near here. Reaching out because I feel so helples

I am brand near here. Reaching out because I feel so helpless and hopeless.

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[220]
Jun 13

Well like I said yesterday I am not here because of Carol, I have dealt with the loss of her though I do miss her and wish I had her to help me through this. This depression has been brought on by my son. I am dealing with which most people call empty nest syndrome, though it feels much more like a lost of my life. I was a single Mom and it was him and I against the world. I had prepared myself for him to go to college but always thought we would be there for each other. I did not prepare myself for him to fall in love and disown me. His wife "opened his eyes" and let him see how messed up I am and all the things I did wrong and he has completely disowned me. I am sad all the time. I hurt so much.I like you, I exercise, eat healthy quit smoking trying yoga but still break into tears at the drop of a hat. I can't seem to get well. I obviously did something right because he grew up to be a good husband and man and now father, but I truly thought I would be apart of it. He's healthy, doesn't drink or smoke or do drugs and in my mind I feel that if me being out of his world makes him be a better man and person than of course that's what must be done. But my heart hurts soooooo much. Someone told me right after this started " A son is a son till he takes a wife, A daughter is a daughter all her life."

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[155]
Jun 13

@Samilee I know it hurts. My older sister is going through the same exact thing. I am not a wise woman, and not very good at giving advice. All I can say is you will always be his mother and he will always need you. (Even if he doesn’t act like it.) Even though you don’t see each other or talk as often I know he still loves you and thinks of you all the time because you are his mother.

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[220]
Jun 13

I truly wished that made me feel any better

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