I feel soo down and depressed lately, I honestly don't know

I feel soo down and depressed lately, I honestly don't know why or how anyone could love me like this. I have gained SO much weight in the last 2 years! I'm the biggest I have ever been. It's so bad that I literally live in my room! I stay in my bed all day long!! Of course this isn't how I wanna live at all I wanna be able to go do things. I have let this yet so out of control.. on top of being so overweight my left leg has been swollen for over a year now and it's only getting worse, I can't even wear any of my shoes I used to because my foot is so huge! I refuse to go to the doctor. I just wish I could get up enough courage and strength to just go to the doctor but I'm so stubborn and scared to. I don't get it! Why am I like this. I have a boyfriend that I have been with for 4 years now and he loves me no matter what..he is amazing and I know he is scared about my health to and it's getting to him. Which makes me feel like such a crappy person for not getting help. Ugggghhh!!!! A part of me just keeps thinking that im gonna wake up and everything will be better.. but that hasn't happened yet!

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CKBlossom's picture
(514105)
Oct 14

A swollen leg for a year doesn't seem normal nor is it good to let depression be left untreated.  Are you afraid of seeing a doctor?

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It's ok to be scared but things can get better. Challenge that fear and get on the phone tomorrow and find a Dr if you don't have one and make an appt don't think about anything else just make the appt and worry about the rest later. Take one step at a time. After you make the appt let that digest and settle. Then make plans on who you want to go with you and or take you. If you don't want them to go in to see the Dr with you that's fine have them wait in waiting area. Stay on one thing at a time.

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Inmylittleroom's picture

Please don't ignore your health in hopes it will get better on it's own.
There are several reasons why your leg and foot are swollen. If waiting to see a doctor at an appointment is too overwhelming, muster the courage to have your boyfriend bring you to the ER.
I usually get too depressed waiting a week or more to see a dr. So I go to the ER. (There's no time to get more depressed or to back out.)
Once you find out what is wrong you can focus on that instead of worrying about. And you will have made your boyfriend really happy. :)

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