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Hi All, so it's been a while. Still going through the ups an

Hakuna_Matata's picture
[1605]

Hi All, so it's been a while. Still going through the ups and downs of the break up. It's been difficult. It's been a really difficult transition after so many years. I can't seem to get over the infidelity and she's living with her now. They are supposedly just friends but my gut is screaming at me to stop being so **** stupid. She still gets angry with life and I become the target. Today I was the target. Today's been pretty freaking ******.
To top it off All my friends are far, I don't leave my house, I have no energy to really do anything. I don't see myself ever making friends or having a relationship. I have otten to the point where i believe this is my life. Raising a child alone until he is of age to have his own life than being SOL with my shows.

I've been focusing a lot on helping others ( such as the individual from my last post) It's definitely helps some but once the excitement from helping settles, the pain kicks back in. I don't know but it's tough. It's something else. TV's been my best friend and yes i know it eats my brain up but it numbs me and right now.. that's pretty freaking great. Crazy, through this post I just realized that I went from helping one person to helping another. It's like i NEED to help someone to feel like i'm worth something. Is that pathetic?

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Foundlove's picture
[23355]
Aug 14

It’s great thing to help others, for me I enjoy helping people also. There’s joy and good energy from it... nothing wrong with that! Personally I think you should do lil trial thing where try new things that could be helpful when you have the energy. For me, my goal was healing from past relationship breakup also so I got book called trauma toolkit which had different types of healing in there and went through that, and tried everything just to figure out if it worked. I feel like it made huge difference... some of big ones which helped me were meditation, workbook exercises, counseling, nature, journal, and of course this online support group. I couldn’t find support group in person that was very helpful... a lot of people were court mandated in the one that I was attending and didn’t want to actually be there for change.

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outoftheblue72's picture
[12000]
Aug 14

@Jaydubb47 holy moses!! You should be a motivational coach/speaker! I've been doing all of these things but want to do more of it after reading your post! Very well said :) I especially love "Everything you are struggling with is choices you are making".

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[2970]
Aug 14

Thanks for sharing all that. Yes you are WORTH IT!!!!! i am glad everyone here is supporting you through this.

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