So I'm hurting. What is new though right? I finally racked u

So I'm hurting. What is new though right? I finally racked up enough courage to call a mediator for a consultation. O don't want a seperation or divorce but he does. He rants about it often. And i love him so much but his sleeping with a 24 year old and then me whenever he feels like it has made me lose all hope in him. O atill don't want this but he wants his freedom and wjo am I to deny him that? I just wish I could find my stride and be better. Its been a year since he called it quits and I've been beaten up emotionally and mentally yet still find myself wanting him. I'm lost and to know I took a step that puts more distance between us is agonizing. My heart burns with fear, sadness, anger...etc. He says he doesn't care about this girl I believe that to a certain extent but as I have mentioned to an extent. I don't know what he wants from me. He says just friendship but he doesn't even care about my feelings. I mean he is in cobtact with the other girl he cheated on me with. I'm broken and I want to just runaway and never speak to him or see him again yet I yearn for his attention and his compliments and his loven his affection. It kills me that he is probably goving ot all to these girls. I pretend to be okay even though I'm dying but I try to put a strong face on for my son. I have too many issues now. My son has now been referred to counseling at the school because of extreme behavioral issues. I don't understand because we don't really do anything different in front of him. I mean his father and I are no longer affectionate toward eachother unless its sex and of course my child is not aware of this. The thing he does notice is his father always leaves every night. I honestly don't know what I need anymore. I just wish I can finally just be okay and just find myseld. I want to encourage and inspire my son. I want my son to be happy and thrive. I feel this family is so broken and it all feels like its my fault. I wish I can fix it but I can't.

show more ⇓
Comment
 11
View 8 More Comments
[2385]
Feb 16

@adamx13 really? I wonder why women would see that as a bad quality? To me it shows dedication and love.

Reply
[108520]
Feb 16

hi..a marriage is a commitment to one another. he broke it.. he is cheating. ask him to stop it. or go for separation... stay friends with him though because he is the father of your child. a good way is to see a counseillor for emotional support and also check on your finances. concentrate on you . mae yourself strong... when you do that you will feel better about yourself and also with your kid...

Reply
Frostybuds's picture
[420]
Feb 17

@me13 I thought the same thing for a long time but you know what? I was wrong and I guarantee you are too! Hang in there and all will be fine.

Reply

Login or Register

You are visiting Support Groups as an anonymous user.

Please consider joining our community and gain access to additional features by

registering or logging into your account