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This is my first time here. I don't know if it is the right

This is my first time here. I don't know if it is the right place to post. I'm a very lonely 44 year old woman. I'm married with a kid, but I have zero friends and family in the country where I live. All my family lives in another country where I'm from. But I'm not close to my family either. I love my aging parents very much, but they would not understand my situation if I told them, and I don't want to burden with my misery anyway. I feel hopeless and helpless at times. I also have BPD, which makes it hard to maintain friendships and relationships. My daughter is the only person that seems to love me and i love her more than anything else in this world. I try my best to be a good mom to her. My husband is a decent man. He cares for me, but I don't think he loves me. It's the same with me. I care for my husband. He's like a friend to me, but I love him more like a brother. We are in a sexless marriage for a long time, and the lack of intimacy also makes me very sad and I feel like there is no one that would understand me. I think about suicide a lot, but I never would carry through it. It would devastate and crush my daughter. I'm keeping myself alive only for my daughter's sake.

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kisobel's picture
[-710880]
Oct 15

@Bevey - You decide what you want to do. You might need to find a new shrink. There is no reason to accept brutal treatment. What country are you in? Hugs.

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[235]
Oct 16

I live in the US. Isolating and self care has diminished, but I’m not suicidal or homicidal. I know that a psych place will not help. I hope someone has a suggestion.
Thanks so much,
Bevey❤️

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[235]
Oct 16

I am so frightened. I don’t belong in a psyche place. I’ve been depressed, but never wanting to hurt myself or others. Do I have any say here? I welcome suggestions. Thanks, Bevey..

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