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A.) I have decided that the only other women i truely can ge

A.) I have decided that the only other women i truely can get along with are other borderlines. They are the only ones who understand how my brain works. B.) I feel like I am going to be like this forever....like have that same borderline loop thinking playing like a record in my head that will never fully stop.
The only time i feel comfort in myself is talking with other borderlines. It is like finally not feeling crazy. My mind is looping right now. I am not using my dbt skills at the moment but am trying to focus on radical acceptance at the present.
C.) I am afraid that my boyfriend is finally going to leave me this time. I said some hurtful things last night in emotion mind and acted very very selfishly. I realized today in wise mind the impact of what i said and feel as if it is too late. I love him. He is my soul mate. I hate that he hurts because of me. I hate that he walks on egg shells. I hate that he desperately wants to help and understand me but just cant because his brain is normal. I honestly dont want to lose him but i push him to the brink all of the time because my thoughts are irrational and my emotions are intense. Kind words...please? You guys i am so nervous right now. What if i ruined everything?

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CKBlossom's picture
[431720]
Dec 28

Obviously he loves you and relationships are about understanding that which we don't actually have personal knowledge of.

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Xtraterrestrial's picture
[2905]
Jan 12

Hey pretend... I can't pretend I don't know you bc I'm pretty sure I do. My BPD diagnosis is not a certainty like the few other diags also are, but that way of thinking is so familiar. All my life I've felt no connection and every relationship I've tried to have stopped abruptly nearly immediately. All except one. The one with no love. Only an attempt to save myself from myself. (I self harm) and have never been able to stop for a significant period. So I've been unsuccessful in my self saving. I need connection so maybe in this online sort of superficial way, we can exchange thoughts and maybe move into a better place. You can contact me anytime.

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Thank you. I would like that :)

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