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Do we really need a life partner?Even if you are a man or a

Pestisor's picture
[35440]

Do we really need a life partner?Even if you are a man or a woman.Ofcourse if you find someone that's a really good partner then that's a bonus.But do we really need one as society tries to pressure us?I mean I would rather have no partner at whatever age than a "bad partner".I never wish to mary anyway,or have my own children,I would rather have more money later in life than a family,but I would like to addopt a child later in life if I can afford it.I would like to get a partner but instead of having an abusive or whatever kind of bad partner I would rather have my financial independence and maybe pets.I can think that having a partner can make life cheaper because it's cheaper to live in two and share the costs but I would rather not.What do you think about this?
I'm feeling like there is this pressure is society that kind of says that for a succesfull life you need to have a family..and if not children at least a husband or stuff...but why..why does this means succes?I would rather have financial independence and time for myself and do with the time in this life whatever makes me happy.

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[24795]
Mar 13

our original home was 160ft from his mom's house...we couldn't even go eat on our front porch without her coming outside... very overbearing...he saw this as a problem and decided we should move 2 hrs away...we had a friend at that time that tried to advise us that 2 hrs away and closer to his older brother jim was actually a very bad idea and wouldn't solve our problem (meddling)...he assured me that jim wasn't like that so we moved 4 miles from jim...oh my god...he was actually the WORST!!!!! we had no privacy at all!!!! he was meddling in our finances...actually checking our balances on our bank accounts without permission...trying to tell us how to run our farm which had an entirely different goal than his farm...tried to tell me what color shutters I should put on my house...it was OBNOXIOUS!!!! so that's the house we are stuck in bc although it has been on the market for years it just wont seem to sell...just like the original home just wont seem to sell either...this put us in debt...and what newly married couple doesn't argue about finances when they get tight bc there are roadblocks everywhere to fix the issue...both my husband and I did not have a mortgage when we met...at the age of 29yrs old I did not have a mortgage bc I outright owned my home...I was angry that what we agreed and planned on was put to a stop by his meddling family and their local connections...what we have been through is utterly unbelievable...it IS WHY we didn't make it...the first few years of a marriage are crucial...when a family purposefully puts as much drama, stress, chaos, and anxiety as possible then how can the newly weds bond and enjoy their time together...but that's what they wanted...right now they are trying their hardest to convince me that he is back at the house his mom lives in...that's only bc they know that if I knew for a fact that he was with his OW that I'd press charges on what he actually did to me the last day he was here...that would mean jail time for him and god forbid his family actually have to admit that their and the church's abuse pushed things wayyyyy too far...

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[14055]
Mar 13

Good for you @Pestisor - YOU DECIDE THE LIFE YOU WANT TO LIVE AND GO FOR IT. If you find someone with similar values, lifestyle, aspirations, aims, etc - then yes, you may have a partner.

Do not have a partner where you ABANDON yourself and what you want - that is not life that is survival.

Adopting a child can be rewarding for the parents and child as long as it is done for the right reasons

It is not necessarily cheaper having a partner - I paid for everything for my husband and me and now I am single it is cheaper!!

Society does not know YOU so who is society to dictate and pressure - don't buy into it. Create your own life. Good luck to you

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Jtr4136's picture
[175]
Mar 16

Do what makes you happy ! As long as you are honest in what you want / don't want , hats the problem. I have one child and i think people simply having kids./ getting married to fit into society is absolutely the worst thing someone can do.

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