Happy 2020!!!
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I'm getting depressed thinking about my birthday this weeken

I'm getting depressed thinking about my birthday this weekend. I'm not going anymore, so it shouldn't matter, but I still want to do something. I just want a friend or family member to have a meal with me or something. I don't really have family though, and the only way I could get a friend to do something with me is if I paid. Even my kids tell me my birthday is sad. They always ask why noone sees me or gives me presents. Some years, they don't even know it's my birthday. I know it's dumb to make a big deal out of it, buts just another reminder of how no adult in this world cares about me and how I've lived for so long without achieving anything.

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Jan 15

Hi there,
My birthday is in December and is often forgotten by my family and friends. I have experienced some of those same feelings, and I want you to know that you are loved! You are thought about, and that your birthday matters. It is a celebration of life.

Have you considered buying yourself some flowers, enjoying a cupcake, or buying a balloon to celebrate your day? Just enjoy it! I found that by just being thankful that I am alive and that my limbs are working, my heart is beating, and that I am able to enjoy each moment of the day, is a big deal! I am so grateful to live and enjoy another day.

I pray that you have a fantastic birthday and enjoy your special moments. I am sure thinking of you, my friend. Happy (early) Birthday!

SoJollyJ's picture
Jan 16

Thanks for the advice and kind words. I'm trying to change my view of the situation, but I'm having trouble. I'm not grateful to be alive if I have to be alone. I don't want to go treat myself to anything because I cannot think of one thing that I will enjoy doing by myself. I'm going to try to sleep through the day. That seems like it will be the least harmful.

Jan 21

Hi SoJollyj, Hope you made it through your birthday successfully! I wanted to send you a message of encouragement from someone who has lived a lot of life alone. I found myself on the outs with my parents and eventually my one sister for marrying my husband. For years I played the fool to have them in my life and would pay for them to do things with me just so I felt included. But as the years passed I realized my constant seeking their approval or planning things they made me in the end to feel guilty of doing was actually harming me. I made the decision to celebrate with my kids every chance I got. We celebrated good grades, end of semester, summer, birthdays....you name it! Once my kids said, "Why do we celebrate if no one else ever comes around?" I answered. "Well, we are somebodies and we need to start acting like we matter." Now as adults my kids know they have value despite distant or non existent extended family being around. We, through practice, learned how to be happy! I suggest if you did sleep all day on your birthday to get dressed and go to DQ and buy yourself an ice-cream birthday cake. Celebrate your birth! Which without being born you would have never know the joy of being a momma. I also encourage you to seek help. We need assistance through these difficult years. You can call 1-855-382-5433 to find a friendly counselor near you. God bless you and Happy Belated Birthday!

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