I need support. I was averaging 10 (.5 mg each) Klonopin a d

I need support. I was averaging 10 (.5 mg each) Klonopin a day. I have been abusing various types of benzos for 7-8 years.Last week I dropped all the way down to 4 without tapering.
This week I'm down to 3. I'm feel ok considering what my body is going through. I told my Dr the truth hoping she would help me taper off slowly. She got scared I guess and took me down to 3 pills. Everything I read online says that I'm at risk for seizures, panic attacks, insomnia, and extreme depression. I have had all those symptoms.
I promised myself that I would never ever buy them on the street or take someone else's medication again...... And I really want to keep that promise but my I feel that my dr got mad and felt betrayed and I really just was asking for help.
No matter what I'm going to suffer through this. I think about my life...... Do I want to be dependent on these forever? Look at how much of my life I've slept away because of these drugs. I slept because the anxiety and the stress of the traumas I've experienced still haunt me.... I have panic attacks and they are horrible.... But these drugs make the panic attacks 5X worse in the long run. I will suffer now and life the rest of my life drug free.

I don't want to be ***** though. I know this is going to be a battle and take a lot of work.

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Beautiful_soul's picture
May 15, 2015

Thank you for the encouragement. How r u doing?

SunnyTomorrow's picture
May 15, 2015

I am sad and having crying spells , but that's a normal day for me. When I saw in your post you had been taking Kpin , I just wanted to tell you I started hearing voices and took 16 one night because I couldn't get to sleep.
Would up in psych ward for two weeks. One of the best things that's happened to me. The voice kept saying "you don't deserve to live". I'm not schizophrenic so I'm feel sure it was the Kpin. That and Paxil were very detrimental , but the doctor gave them to me , so I took them. I know better now. How are you ?

Beautiful_soul's picture
May 15, 2015

@SunnyTomorrow it is frustrating working with Drs and not having a medical detox or even tapering.


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