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Been a long time since I have posted on here.... *** TRIGG

KML_Hunnie1990's picture
[130005]

Been a long time since I have posted on here....
*** TRIGGER WARNING***
almost 3 years ago in October I was raped whilst asleep, coming up to nearly 2 years he's been in prison in October, I've not had support or help in dealing with the event and had to cope by myself, every time it's brought up I break down and feel like I'm reliving it all over again, took me a while to start trust males again, and getting into a relationship.... I have a loving partner and currently pregnant but if he's asleep and touches me I have a horrible sensation rush through me, panic and fear not knowing what to feel, I know he will never hurt me and I know he's not that kind of person but I can't shake the feeling of fear...
I don't want to live in fear but I don't know how to get rid of the feeling...
I guess I've come here for advise and help as this site and the people got me through a lot in the past

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Darkandtwisty81's picture
[5200]
Jun 5

@KML_Hunnie1990 26 years ago I'm a hell of a lot better now but it took time just know your not alone and sounds as you have a great partner lean and rust in him it's the best way to heal

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[90]
Jun 9

My rapist is still are large. I worry about women today. I worry so much today for all.

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Acrossthepondmsc's picture
[625]
Jun 24

Everytime I go into heavy ptsd symptoms it's so discouraging; how am I ever going to rebuild a life when ptsd keeps derailing me? It makes me feel so badly about myself, and it sounds like you might be feeling that way?

Is this your first baby? I remember some of the feelings I had during my first pregnancy; it's an incredibly vulnerable time when you can feel so frightened and powerless, in addition to the way that pregnancy hormones amplify EVERYTHING. It's a lot to deal with, and then throw in your post-rape ptsd into it. Wow. If you're staying stable and functional - at all !- then you should give yourself a big round of applause for how well you're handling everything!

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