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I’ve been in grad school since January, living with one ro

I’ve been in grad school since January, living with one roommate who became one of my closest friends in the grad school program. We were together 24/7 during school and coming back home to study etc, we had a lot of “growing pains” that we worked through. But we are having to change programs and move to a different state (long story) so we decided not to live together this next time but we will be seeing each other every day etc which is good. However, the girl she is living with now (Who’s in our friend group) told me straight up she didn’t want to live with me. She said a lot of things about me that she didn’t agree with, but she has never at all tried to get to know me personally. I am always the one reaching out to her and sending her encouragement/bible verses during school because it’s been unbelievably hard. She just wants to be friends with my old roommate and it’s obvious and it really hurts me. Since the decision has been made about living situations, I’ve lost 18 pounds and have been working on myself these past 3 months. I’ll be moving in August and I’ll see my “friends” then but I’m still frustrated and want to show them how big of a badass I am. I can do anything and they didn’t believe in me. But here I am disciplined and have done well in online school/lost weight to prove it. I’m not even sure if they will care.

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justamomof2's picture
[3125]
Jul 1

I personally don't think you need to prove anything to your so called friends-your poise and confidence say it all. And I think if you try to prove they were wrong about you, you may end up making them think you are dependent on what they think about you. I think killing them with kindness is the strongest play-you are so happy and nice and you don't need their friendship. But if they would like to be friends then you are okay with that.

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[840]
Jul 1

@justamomof2 thank you for your response. You are so right. I think that will take me a while to change my defensive mindset I have but I want to work towards what you’re saying. Thank you for your sweet, sweet response. Xx

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[840]
Jul 1

I feel so alone.

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