I feel way too lost, hopeless, sad, aggravated, alone, and i

(10365)

I feel way too lost, hopeless, sad, aggravated, alone, and insignificant all the time now. I started a little more than over a year ago trying to get help/better starting with joining this site. I honestly feel like I'm strictly worse off now then I was a year ago not to say that most of the people on here haven't been helpful/nice to me buu but since trying to get better (for whatever reason) I'm back to feeling as bad as I did in middle/high school, wanting/thinking about ending my life, feeling sad all the time, like I don't have a purpose, I want to find something/someone in life to keep me going, to give me a reason to live for but knowing myself I don't really feel like that's even possible. I don't want to be alone anymore but probably how it'll be for a while if not forever. Which I hate it so much bc I've tried and kept on through all the s*** that's went on throughout my life which I know my life is not as bad as alot of people (I'm a straight white male) but no one should go through what I've gone through. With all the things I've been through, all the bad people in the world and horrible things they do, all the f***** up things that can occur, my life being screwed up in so many ways bc other people, all the pain I constantly have to deal with, the issues and problems I have which some won't eve tdd go away atleast not completely. Combined all that with how I don't enjoy anything and can't have relationships easily due to my problems then what's the point in trying, in living just to die, in living just to suffer, never t ok feel accepted or happy, to not be able to love someone else, to be able to spend your life with them, to have someone actually care about you instead of just watching you suffer. I really don't know how much more I can take. I'm not living I'm just being tortured. I feel so lost.

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oceanfloor's picture
(350)
Jan 5

I have been crying for no reason when I'm alone at home. Just feeling incredibly lonely and unworthy almost suffocating and then those negative thoughts kicked in.

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(130240)
Jan 5

@Jordan5683
Take one small step. Get some thing to look forward to. Maybe just show interest in 3potentials in one day. Dont look for same reply. Check for reply next day or 2 and limit that check in to 3 in a day. ...Yes alwayss easier to try and brainstorn for others

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Sorry you are feeling this way. Do know that people care for you and pray for you. Also know that people can relate to what you are feeling. There are better days ahead! Life is a series of ups and downs. Don't make a hasty move while you are feeling down. God cares for you. The Bible has a passage that says "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit". That is a passage that I think of when I am down. I also pray that God will help me have a better perspective. During really down times - I seek out a Pastor or counselor to listen to my worries and concerns. It is good to hear their positive words and also to have them pray with me. God Bless you my friend! Prayers that you can soon be in a better situation.

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