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Let's try the power or a support group... bottled-up emotion

Let's try the power or a support group... bottled-up emotions inside and no one really to talk to, so I hope I find some help and maybe some advise here. I am new to "online talking"... I have been married to a great guy for almost 6-years now (together 8). Our physical intimacy has never been great (compared to some previous relationships), but in the past 6 years it has died off completely! We have not been intimate in any shape of form at all since summer of 2015. My husband just isn't interested in sex at all and we can't talk about it. I would be happier even if there was SOME intimacy, something that makes him different from being just a friend. I have tried to bring it up many times (in a good way and in a bad way probably too sometimes) that I am unhappy about it, but he literally stays silent and can't say anything. This has led to a lot of insecurities on my side and hurt feeling and resentment, which is now taking over our emotional intimacy as well. He is a great guy, we have a good life and a wonderful daughter (conceived via IVF), I love him and I know he loves me but the thought of not having sex ever again in my life makes me truly sad and depressed... I cry a lot, feel pity for myself, have a low-self-esteem. I am embarrassed to talk about our issue to anyone... is there anybody out there who is experiencing a similar situation?

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Hi Finnlady. Can you slowly ease into touching him again. Rubbing his hair. Rubbing his arms, chest. It may get him more in the mood. You can reach for his uhhuh. Try talking again. I am so sorry you are going thru this. I really hope the spark returns. They have couples counseling that talk about these things together. Best wishes

Feb 15

Follow your instincts. But never feel embarrassed to seek help from a professional.

Feb 17

Finnlady, I am so sorry that you find yourself in this position. Please do not think that you are inferior or unwanted in any way; this is something that your husband must deal with (was IVF because of him??), an insecurity within himself OR it could actually be medically induced, such as his testoterone levels are low or even non-existent; many times we only concern ourselves with women's hormones, but hormones are the life of all of us and must be dealt with. If it turns out that it is a psychological issue that your husband refuses to deal with or if he refuses to follow up with his general doctor, then, unfortunately, you will have a really tough decision to make. I am praying for you.


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