Hello Amazing Members this week's "Life Hack" is out, click BLOG (above on the green menu bar) to check it out!!!! *****"Imperfection is my kind of perfect!"*****Learning to be okay with a life that is perfectly IMPERFECT!!!! HINT: when you click https://www.supportgroups.com/blog/imperfection-is-my-kind-of-perfect, make sure to click READ MORE to see the full article. -SG

**Trigger warning...So...this is basically my last weekend

**Trigger warning...
So...this is basically my last weekend on this Earth. What's really awful is that I don't even want to do this. Things in my life fell apart so quickly and the final piece that brought any minute amount of joy is about to be taken from me. Believe it or not my job is predicated on helping those that are less fortunate. I loved being able to help people that needed it, even people struggling with suicide. I recently made a gross oversight in ppw and now that's going to be ripped from me. Years of work and assistance gone and my reputation ruined. I can't go on like that. I'm on here because I made my calls...and no one picked up. Letters are written and I've been sitting here in the dark things about my last few days. I'm going out in a blaze tho...they're not gonna find me laid out next to a Silvia Plath novel with some melancholy tune in the background...in fact they aren't gonna find me at all. I know it's the dead of night everywhere in the US right now but if someone is awake and reads this whom has made the attempt....my question to you is simple. How much pain am I in for, mind you...I'll have a lot of alcohol and coke in my system. I've been through a great deal of pain for most of my life and I'd like to prepare for how painful my final moments will be

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[755]
Feb 13

@mechele thank you. It is very true that I don't want to do this at all. But what scares me most is that I know I have to. I don't have the clean means to do this so I have spent most of the night looking at crude backups. It seems that that list is being headed up by free fall dive and hanging

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mechele's picture
[144095]
Feb 13

@TWDreality84 no you don't have to. That's the beautiful part of this. This is not the only option. Think about the person who would find you, what horrible things they would have to endure the rest of their life after finding you that way.
Think of your mother having to relive your death every time she had to tell your father again and again and again what happened to you. That is not fair to her. Surely she has not done anything in her life so bad that she deserves that. You will break so many hearts if you are successful.
Thank God you truly do not want to do this, that means there is HOPE! Let that hope back into your heart. I know that things seem so bad now, but given time, things can get better.

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mechele's picture
[144095]
Feb 13

@TWDreality84 I have yo get going but will try to check in around noon or 1 today... That would be EST if you need to talk some more. Hang in there buddy. It's all going to work out. We all have our weak moments. We can turn them into strengths instead of weaknesses but first you have to be here to do that! Try to have a good morning. Talk more later.

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