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****I need to vent and this is my safe place***** I didnt r

Tryinghard420's picture
[760]

****I need to vent and this is my safe place*****
I didnt realise how sick she really is.
Let me explain......
My biological mother is an alcoholic and has been for almost 30 years. (I'm going to be 28 in Nov). She lost me as a newborn so my aunt (her sister) adopted me when I 4. I always knew she was sick just didnt know the extent of it.
She drinks till pass out.... Sometimes she pees on the kitchen floor........broken bones.......you name it. No one will step in to help because she has to admit she needs help. She refuses help when someone offers.
I lived with her for 3 months. 2 days before Valentines day she and I was arguing over a coffee pot. My son who was about 2 was in the kitchen near by me and she almost threw it at me. The cops were called and all I was asked was 'is she still drinking?"
I don't get why NO ONE will help her.

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[1400]
Sep 11

Hi Trying Hard, it sounds like you are trying really really hard. You are obviously a very loving and kind person who cares about her Mom. Of course it must pain you deeply to watch her harm herself as she is. You feel helpless and you want to change it for her. Sadly, you are trying harder than she is. Everyone is right that she has to want the help. If she does not acknowledge that she at least needs help, she stays stuck and your hands are tied. Alcoholics Anonymous is an excellent group and they have meetings round the clock almost everywhere. Maybe you want to consider going to meeting with her? Tell her you love her and want to go with her to talk to people who are struggling like she is. No judgement, no condemnation, just accept her where she is and see if she would consider going. If she refuses, you have to let it go. Every so often, you can ask her. You can even leave the number to call them on her table. You never know if she will feel desperate enough to reach out. You can also pray for her. Prayer is powerfull and you can do that. Part of the serenity prayer says "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference." I pray for your wisdom. Take care of yourself and your precious child. Your Mom will be in my prayers.

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Tryinghard420's picture
[760]
Sep 11

Thank you everyone.

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[20]
Sep 19

She has to want to quit, my husband is an alcoholic who has been in and out of the hospital the last 5 years, he was diagnosed with decompensated liver disease about 2 & 1/2 years ago (stage 4) he was drinking a fifth of liquor a day plus at least 18 beers a day sometimes more, he quit drinking for 3 months after the last hospital visit but has gone back to drinking beer, it is not easy to live with a person dying from liver disease I pray your mom finds the strength to quit

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