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I don't remember much about most of my childhood but I do re

SpookyNoodles's picture
[255]

I don't remember much about most of my childhood but I do remember that the abuse started when I was 6 that was after my youngest sister was born is when that woman started acting differently. She would yell at me at the top of her lungs over the smallest things, hit me over the smallest things and tell me things like "I was being bad" or that I am "hard-headed", she was extremely over protective of her and for the longest I hated my little sister so much until her passing from a fire accident but my burning hatred for this woman I used to call my mother is still there.

I remember how she used to slap my face so hard that I would get nosebleeds, I never forget that. She made me felt dirty, stupid, and incompetent when I was as young as 8 years old she would accuse me of being "fast" which is a slang term for my race for being promiscuous which is why I think I have a huge disgust and aversion towards sex.

This isn't meant to offend anyone but most of the time I cannot trust women especially if they are mothers, I feel disgusted when they touch me even if it's just a hug or a pat on the back part of me wants to break their fingers off and yell at the top of my lungs that I know they hate their daughters, that they are abusing their kids behind the scenes, and their nice behavior is just a facade.

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SpookyNoodles's picture
[255]
Feb 8

@Littleturtle1000 she never has gotten a diagnosis but me and my sister suspect that she's schizophrenic

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SpookyNoodles's picture
[255]
Feb 8

@Enoch327 I'm the same way what my mother did to me still affects me in my daily life and people like my dad don't see that

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SpookyNoodles's picture
[255]
Feb 8

@TanyaL I can't tell you what to do about it except seek help and find good coping mechanisms

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