Hi. A week ago my boyfriend and I went to Vegas for the week

(115)

Hi. A week ago my boyfriend and I went to Vegas for the weekend and 3 of the 4 nights there he had too much too drink and freaked out on me. Calling me names, screaming and throwing my stuff around the Hotel room. The last night though he not only slapped me in the face, which wasn't the first time, he also close fist punched me in the jaw and slammed my head on the edge of the bed and started choking me. Also that night he had snapped my glasses and pretended like he had destroyed my phone. We traveled back from Vegas and had a conversation about him not drinking anymore and he complained about how hard quitting cold turkey would be for him. I just told him he had to choose drinking or me and pointed to my jaw which had a bruise from him hitting me. I know he felt really bad about it and so far as I know hasn't drank anything but I'm having a really hard time with everything that had happened. I dont like the fact that I feel like I cant tell anyone he punched me. I tell my best friend everything and I know my Mom's first husband was abusive. I guess I just don't know what to do. I really do adore him and care about him and I know he has a lot of underlying issues based off of a really hard childhood. Our relationship just seems to be spiraling out of control and only getting worse and Vegas was supposed to be a restarting point for us and instead it was an absolute nightmare. I guess my main thing is I want to talk about it but I don't think I'm ready to give up on him and I know how dissapointed everyone in my life would be in me knowing he had punched me

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Foundlove's picture
(34960)
Jan 15

Abuse from people most of the time escalates and I noticed from your post you wrote how it escalated from calling you names to screaming to throwing your things to finally punching you. Please don’t undermine his actions to drinking... there’s lot of people get drunk and don’t get violent. Some people use alcohol as excuse to mistreat others and it’s not the alcohol. It’s the person. The long term physical complications you could potentially have from this guy is not worth it. I have a wrist messed up n ear messed up that I suspect was from my ex abusive husband. My friend got all her teeth messed up from an abusive guy. I think your health and safety is more important than this guy. You do need to file police report, and let family n friends know. You need all the help and support you can get to protect yourself from this evil person. Have you heard of narcissist? Research all you can about abuse because abusive guys rarely change. I know your hoping he’s gonna change and quit drinking and if he would only do this then everything would be fine. You should think about leaving him as punishment for his actions and he can earn you back. If he quits drinking, successfully goes through an aa program or something and gets therapy then maybe he could have earned you back. The problem with abusive men is they don’t respect women and also they lack empathy but this guy likely not gonna change just because you want him to. He’s most likely to change if you leave him n show him the consequences of his actions because if you stay he will deep down think it’s ok what I’m doing... nothings gonna change. This kind of relationship is unhealthy... and many women sadly end up extremely hurt or dead from abusive men like this. I feel like you need to rest and clear your head away from this toxic situation and regain your strength n heal. Please don’t excuse his actions, this is very serious and he’s not worth it. I will keep you in my thoughts n prayers, I hope you get some peace n find the strength to get through all this!

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(24890)
Jan 14

@Foundlove You had the absolute best response! I hope Dapple reads this

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Foundlove's picture
(34960)
Jan 15

@NCMom thank you hope your doing well

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