Troiani'sWay

Raising children, nonetheless challenging children, is not an instruction based job. There isn’t a policy and procedure, best practice, or how to guide. The hours are long, demand is great, and the pay well… no need to embarrass ourselves on that topic! Let’s just say we put out way more dollars than we will ever get back in! When we get into rewards, now that’s where the bonus and incentives are great. With raising families where there are two or more children sometimes we can forget that every child is different. In my home there are four children. Perris, age nine. Kemauri, age 8. Troiani, age 7. Lastly and certainly not least is Ahryan, age 3. Other than the obvious differences, age and sex, my children have behavioral differences that are great. Troiani and Kemauri have ADHD. Troiani is my only child with bipolar disorder, and Kemauri is my only child with ODD. Perris doesn’t have any disorders but I have discovered that she has hidden her faults behind her siblings behaviors. Now that they are getting better her father and I have had to look at our “perfect” child in a different light. We are monitoring Ahryan like a hawk because his behaviors at age three mirror Kemauri’s behavior at that same age. Kemauri, Perris, and Troiani all wear glasses, Ahryan does not. Kemauri wants to learn everything about everything and has an insatiable taste for knowledge that is (at times) draining and aggravating. Perris is mellow loves fantasy, drama, and I can see her in show business. Troiani is artistic, imaginative, and happy. Ahryan floats from person to person learning, growing, and trying to find himself. All my children love movies, books, and electronics. I pored over my history when it was discovered that my children have challenges. I thought back to prenatal vitamins, calorie consumption, books I read or didn’t read. Anything that I could use to “explain” why this happened to me. Kemauri and Troiani were the only children who were nursed; Perris and Ahryan were bottle fed. I reviewed where we lived, what I ate, what I drank, medications I took, and doctors I visited. There were really no differences in these aspects. So then why are my children so diverse? The answer to that question, as with every other parent’s question eludes them as well as me. If you’re a person who wants answers for everything (like me) you won’t always find them as a parent. You will never know what made your three year old try to climb a wall. You will know how to console him when he is bawling uncontrollably because he wants to be just like spider man. You will know how far a cookie goes to smooth bruised bottoms and feelings. You will learn how good it feels to hug your child, to celebrate their successes. You will also learn the pain that they experience and how to protect them from others. If you have a child with a mood disorder, you will learn to recognize her mood swings. How to gage if today will be an ok, easy breezy, or nightmare of a day. If your child has ADHD you will learn creative techniques to keep them busy and how to listen, wait, then respond. With each child’s birth there is no one there to pass out a handbook. Plenty of advice comes from other parents, teachers, doctors, friends, and foes. But from a day to day how to aspect, you will be your only resource. So arm yourself. Read books, take classes, keep journals, track progress, successes, and failures. Teach yourself what is not contained in any class that I have been to. Teach yourself how to handle your difficult child. You may use this site as a guide, a reference, and information center but not as gospel as I am human, I have erred. What works for me may not work for you. The most important thing is to keep trying, do not stop, for you are your child’s advocate.

Latest Posts by Troiani'sWay

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  The Importance of Effective Co-Parenting
  Bipolar
          Have you ever found yourself arguing with your significant other over your child’s behavior? You’re too lenient! It’s your fault...
  Latest Post by CK on Mon, 02/06/2012 - 08:47. Comments - 1
• 
  Effective use of Time Out
  Bipolar
  People have different opinions of time out. But as I am sure that you have come to learn ANYONE can have an opinion. Which leads me to share with you ...
  Latest Post by CK on Fri, 10/21/2011 - 07:10. Comments - 1
• 
  Importance of Effective Co Parenting
  ADHD
  Have you ever found yourself arguing with your significant other over your child’s behavior? You’re too lenient! It’s your fault they act li...
  Latest Post by Troiani'sWay on Fri, 10/21/2011 - 06:33. Comments - 7
• 
  What are the symptoms of bipolar disorder in children and adolescents?
  Bipolar
  One of the biggest challenges has been to differentiate children with mania from those with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. Since both gro...
  Latest Post by Troiani'sWay on Fri, 10/21/2011 - 05:52. Comments - 2
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  Troiani's Way, Support for Parents with Challenging Children
  Bipolar
  This site is, https://sites.google.com/site/troianisway/home , named for my exceptional daughter, Troiani. After a long road she was diagnosed as agg...
  Latest Post by Troiani'sWay on Thu, 10/20/2011 - 10:50. Comments - 2

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