May 21, 2012
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A cry for help...
I am a mess! I'm depressed and I want to self harm so fucking bad that I can just feel the blade on my flesh! I haven't self harmed in five years but the urges are now almost impossible to fight! I don't feel alive anymore, I feel dead inside and I'm only here for my loved ones! When I look at myself in the mirror I have to turn away in shame and disgust! I have a wonderful spouse and grandparents and it may seem like I should be happy but I'm not! I'm happy with the outside part of my life but inside is like a tornado of pain ripping me to pieces! I'm lost and locked in a sinking ship that I never seem to break free from...
By pickles1972 on Tue, 01-24-12, 00:38
Don't go down with ship- you hold the key. I don't know why you are in so much pain but it seems from your post that you have a wonderful support system- value them as much as they value you. You say you are only here for them, why is that a bad thing- they saw something to love in you and truly wish for you to do the same thing. STAY- because LIFE is worth it and there are so many blessing to come, you could never imagine. Let go of the negative self image- you love you, your husband loves you and your grandparents love you... what else could you ask for?
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Don't go down with ship- you hold the key. I don't know why you are in so much pain but it seems from your post that you have a wonderful support system- value them as much as they value you. You say you are only here for them, why is that a bad thing- they saw something to love you and truly wish for you to do the same thing. STAY- because LIFE is worth it and there are so many blessing to come, you could never imagine. Let go of the negative self image- you love you, your husband loves you and your grandparents love you... what else could you ask for?
Take all that you've been given and live life for all it's worth- Marie