Is it just me, but don't you think when they say, "If you are suicidal, please call the 800 number, or go to your local hospital. Get help ASAP." Like all of that is suppose to help. It is suppose to make you feel better. It is suppose to stop you from contemplating ending your miserable existence. None of it works. I have reached out to therapists, people on this site, other people - It simply does not work. People really do not care. They do for a brief moment and then its over. I have learned that when we do not give people what they are look for from you, then they leave. If you don't do what they feel you should do, they leave. If you say the wrong thing or do the wrong thing, they leave. If you appear to be to needy, they leave. People only care for a brief moment and then they are gone. No one to love you. No one to care. Total, utter loneliness and darkness surrounds you. No wonder you want to die. You even pray to God, but He does not hear. He does not come to your rescue. He does not hear your cries late in the midnight hour. You soak your pillow w/your tears, no relief comes. Your heart is aching and broke inside of you. No one. Yes, it's time. Someone how I need relief from me. Your lost. You have no idea of who to turn to. You have no clue to who you are and who you are suppose to be. You don't even know why God allowed you to be born. Always thinking and wondering, some babies are aborted; some babies die at birth or still w/in the womb; some babies grow to be a few years old and die. Why not me??? Oh, how I wish I had never been born. Somehow, I had to be a terrible mistake b/c all I feel is this dreadful heart break. Yes, I do want to die today, but I can't b/c I would face a worse fate.
it made me feel so good to read all of your posts. what began with such tragedy and despair turned into something beautiful and hopeful. thank you all.
M.R.: truly sorry you life is full of so much suffering. i'm glad you are able to reach out here and are receiving such kind responses.
i often urge people to call 800 #s. I know they aren't always the best but they have helped me over the years when i am at my wits end. i've also had the good fortune to have some therapists who were incredibly good, others not so much, but overall I've been supported and helped.
Thank you for your words. I am really glad that you have been blessed to have good people in your life to help you out, some. Not all of us are that blessed.
Hi ur still around! Id miss u if ud gone, stay strong ppl care about u here, im your friend! Best wishes! Take care