WOULD JUST RATHER WALK AWAY
Nice guy, so sweet, tall, dark and handsome. The perfect gentleman, he adores me and just wants nothing but to be with me. Yet I have this deep dark secret!!!!!! What a Fu$$$$k!!. I remember my initial reaction when a friend told me they had HSV, I was afraid, ready to run and did not want anything to do with them, least I caught it, but I knew better and felt that it was NEVER fair to judge a person by the situation they were in. I remained good friends with him, while at the same time exercising caution (natural human instinct). Now the shoe is on the other foot, I have HSV1 - not from him, but from my stupid immature, pathological lying, cheating ex. I can see now how others can and will possibly react to the news of me having HSV1. So my solution? Just don't say anything to the new guy, but also don't be that selfish bastard that puts others at risk by knowingly giving them HSV. I never want others to go through the pain and stress that I am going through. At the same time I do not want the stigma either of being known as the chick with HSV1! So I am slowly coming to terms with the fact that perhaps I am destined to be single/celibate all my life. Something that in all reality would not be so bad, given that I was a later bloomer and have only had sex now 5 years of my over 30 years!!! During those times, I have been very safe, paranoid and stressed to my partner the importance of staying monogamous, but I guess not all care, or share your concerns!!!
So when is it safe to tell a guy that you have HSV. I have known this guy for over a year, but during that time our communication was on and off, and I can only say we were acquintances. Only lately did we get more closer and start spending a little more time together (3 dates really and perhaps talked a total of 4 times over the phone). We do seem however to connect really well and other than the fact that he is way younger (but mature for his age and seeking older women), he is the ideal, perfect guy for me. We have not been intimate and I do not intend for it to get to that point, is just sucks that just when the right guy comes around, then this ugly fu$$$$King beast called HSV1 hangs around - three is a crowd!!!!! It is times like this that I really loathe my ex for giving me this ugly disease -, before him I was STD free, happy and never had a worry in the world!!!!! Now my world is crumbling!!!!
Perhpas, I should just walk away and make up some excuse for not being able to take my friendship with Mr. hot Indian guy further! Any thoughts?
I felt like I could speak openly here. kind of feeling not attacked, but personally shitty for the choices I made. I don't know who gave it to me and I hate that because I can't approach them about it. I never want to be that person, but feel I already have been. Think I will just live alone. Thanks for the rapid response. Sorry I suck.
I am sorry, I never meant to make you feel like shit. I was just sharing how I felt, especially being on the receiving end, for after all the whole idea of support is taking both the good and the bad. I would not be offering true support if I simply mentioned what you wanted to hear. I will email you privately, please read my message.
It really depends on the person... I read a testimonial from a girl who's BF told her he was HSV+, and it didn't bother her at all, she continued to date him and contracted the virus... then she cared. Still stayed with her partner and still loved him, but every once in a while felt depressed, gross, and upset. But another person who contracted the virus from his/her partner after knowing the risk wasn't upset about it, didn't think the virus was a big deal, and figured they'd be together for the rest of their lives anyway, so it didn't really matter. So again, I say let this person decide for himself!