How long can HSV-2 be dormant before an outbreak?

I was recently diagnosed and am just trying to make sense of it all. I am married, have been for almost 9 years now. I had a small outbreak in May and went to the doctor and was diagnosed. I have had these outbreaks maybe twice before in the past couple of years but didn't know what it was. It doesn't happen often. It is not painful at all. My understanding is, from my doctor, that stress can induce a breakout. My job is very stressful so I'm assuming that is what caused this last breakout. Here is my dilemma though, I have been under much worse stress in previous years and NOT had a breakout so I'm wondering how long can herpes sit dormant in your system and NOT breakout? I've planned my wedding, gone through infertility treatments, surgeries, more infertility treatments (all unsuccessful), battled with my husband for adoption and/or fostering, that was way more stressful over the years than my job is causing me stress and NEVER had a breakout...so why now if I'm the carrier??!!?? I'm trying to determine if by chance my husband had an affair. This puts me in a really tough spot. He hasn't gone to get tested and doesn't seem in any hurry to go. I asked him, and of course he said no. So I have to believe him. I just am wanting proof, statistics somewhere that tells me how long it can sit in your body. I just need answers. Thank you in advance! ;)

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hiswife84's picture
[2485]
Nov 27

Wow frustrated my husband & I hit 8yrs of marriage next month, but mine did cheat. He finally admitted it about a week after the initial diagnosis. He cheated with a mutual friend. Unless your husband admits it you won't really be able to know. He can get tested (blood test) but all that will show is that he has it in his blood. It takes 3 months to show up in the blood, so all that prices is that its not recent. As far as how long it can sit dormant I've read articles of couples who have been married 30yrs no cheating then bam an OB.

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[20]
Apr 16

Just received diagnosis of HSV2 from my doctor (an hour ago). Since Friday, he said it could either be shingles or herpes. I told my husband on Friday it was probably shingles. I've been married to my husband for 22 years but had several partners prior to marriage. No one since. No one can ever be sure about their spouse's fidelity. I don't know if it was me or him. He was married before and had several partners during his single days. I don't even know whether to tell him about this. My dr. told me not to have sex during outbreak but I could "hide" behind the shingles thing. HELP!

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rascal1's picture
[81545]
Apr 16

You could have gotten the virus years ago and it is just now showing it's ugly head. Stress and lowered immunity status will allow a breakout to happen. Having sex just before a breakout or during a breakout will spread them to your partner. Just before you break out you will feel a tingling,soreness in the areas, you also will feel kinda crappy. Just tell him you have an infection and have to wait til it is gone. Or if you are secure in your marriage be honest with him in that you don't know which it is...either way you don't want to share. If the truth were to be known probably more than not have the virus but it is dormant right now.

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