My 9 year old HATES his dad for METH, HELP ME!
This might be a little long but I would like to tell you about my son....
My son is 9 years old, he will be 10 in April. He is the love of my life, my soul mate. He SAVED me, literaly.
He is so smart, funny, well behaved, level headed, very atristic and he LOVES with his whole heart.
None of this is any thanks to his biological father. When I was 2 months pregnant with him, my son's father tried meth for the first time. It was all down hill from there. He got so very wrapped into it, he forgot he is a dad! I hide his father's addiction from him for as long as I could. The last time his dad's house got raided and he went to prison again, I finally had to tell my son the truth. IT WAS THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE! He was devistated, disgusted and so hrt. He asked me a million and one questions that I didn't know how to answer. His dad went to prison, got out and at this point my son his DONE with him.....
What do I do here? I want my son to have a relationship with his dad, who is now sober. How do I ease my son into have a relationship with his dad? Or should I even TRY? Am I wasting my time?
Any advice is very helpful.
so yea sorry i got so dark but i wanted to follow up a bit. you sound like you're on the right track to being a great mother, i'm jealous if anything, best i can say is instead of lamenting over what could have been and what might be, you should be looking towards the future of your son. nuclear families have been going out of style for a long time now and there are some amasing people out there who had only a single parent in their life or some other wierd family composition, make sure you make your current life and family a priority, and do the best that you can with what you have.
Ethos thank you. I told my son that he has my support either way and honestly I would rather my son want nothing to do with him. I don't sugar coat, I just don't always know the right answer.... which is best and so on.
I know I am an amazing mom and my son has tons of love and support from me, I just wish he had a stable dad. I want my son to have a dad.... Even if it isn't his biological one...
I know it is complicated and there is no right answer. I just try and need support and suggestions here...
So thank you for your feedback.
Hi Endo...Sounds like things are starting to unfold and I know you must feel so nervous with trusting the guy...
Our kids don't really perceive what goes on in the household in the same way we do and his concerns for his dad can't possibly be on the same level as yours...I know you're terrified of dad breaking his heart, breaking promises and slipping back into the Meth world...I hope this doesn't happen and after time, they can build a relationship and some sense of your trust...This "can" happen...Try not to fear that your son will have to go through what happened to the two of you but, by all means, always make sure he's safe...
I hope that you are recognized for how hard you worked and he great job done on your own...Give it some time...:)