Men - The Rubber Band Effect
I absolutely love this theory and find it to be quite true, most especially the quote: "The saying “If you love something let it go, If it comes back to you it’s yours, If it doesn’t it never was,” is a perfect metaphor to describe the male intimacy cycle." What are your thoughts on it?
"The saying “If you love something let it go, If it comes back to you it’s yours, If it doesn’t it never was,” is a perfect metaphor to describe the male intimacy cycle.
It is natural that when a man loves a woman, and has been intimate with her for some time, he periodically feels the need to pull away. At this time, what happens for a lot of women is they don’t understand why their relationship has been put on hold. One moment he was very close, and then for no apparent reason, he has become distant.
What they don’t know is that it is natural for him to get the urge to pull away. He has an instinctual need for autonomy. Here’s why . . .
To a certain extent a man loses himself when connecting with his partner. By feeling her needs, wants, problems, and emotions he may lose touch of his own sense of self. Pulling away gives him time to reestablish his personal boundaries and fulfill his need to feel independent....."
Ststephenmc, thank you so much for applying and relating your own personal experience and life to this post, it really put it in such great perspective. It's so important to keep in check with yourself and who you are, I like how you explained it; going to your cave to re-group so to speak.
Moongal, I think that it's so great that you will refrain from introducing intimacy until you feel comfortable doing so. My close friend and I have a pact that we will only go on daytime dates; keeping them super casual and alcohol-free. It's all about spending time with a person and really getting to know them for who they are at the core and knowing that they have good/honest intentions. One of my close male friends told me that the only way to ever know a man's true intentions is time; meaning, to refrain from intimacy until you really know one another.
Keep working on you! You are amazing and the right man will coming into your life at the right time.
Of course Lily, I am praying for you and I know the everything will work out so positively for you. Keep up your wonderfully positive and strong attitude and outlook, and only good will come to you.