HELP ME

HI Rachel,
I think your a beautiful person with a disorder like me and its brave of you to share your story. Its scary but i think you should seek help like i am doing. You need to go seek help asap about the chest pains and I'm scared for you and i don't want anything to happen to you. Its hard but I'll be here to support you cause i know how scary it is as i am a 20 yr old fighting a eating disorder. Please seek help too I don't want to hurt yourself anymore.

Hi rachel,
I really hear you and understand what your going through, I have thoughts like you on a daily basis and i also suffer from an Eating disorder. I strongly agree that you should see a doctor about your chest pains. I am here if you ever want to talk. Maybe we can even help one another. I hope you stay safe and find the strenght to get better.

Thanks for listening but i wont go to the doctors anymore they just put me in the psych ward and it makes me crazy. I know i was told before that i did damage to my heart and it will only take one time for me to go into cardiac arrest when i purge. maybe i think i am waiting for that to happen i was 15 when i started and doing good for the last several years now it is out of control and i can't control it. i really want to be brave enought and just be gone. i have no family support they judge me and never accepted my disorder they just make me feel like i am crazy and they are not talking to me now i guess i embarass them anyways i am 39 and i dont want to make it to 40. i have had enough.

Rach,Hi.I have alot of issues(disorders)But not going to talk about me.Its all about you.I know how your feeling though.feeling alone and desperate,right? Well you are not alone,like no one cares?You are not alone,even though we don't know each other we are in the same boat.I am here for you.I find that trying to help others with compassion and understanding helps me.So maybe try to reach out and try to give some strenth to someone else,see if it helps.Its a good way to feel connected to others who know how you feel.You never know you may save someones life. Kathy

Thank You for listening I do feel so alone, I am better at helping others than myself, i think we all are. Really rough weekend a lot of crazy behavior, i don't know how long i can hold it in anymore. I am just so lonely. I can't stop crying. No more about me how are you? i would like to help you and support you in anyway i can.

Hi rachel,
I have anxieties and obsess about everything. I have felt like you many times. I've had plenty of trauma and even tried to end it all a few times as well. I know how you feel about the medications and how it seems like nobody wants to help guide you to pointB, just seems like everyone wants to fix and tell you what you should or shouldn't be. Your disorder is there, plain and simple. Embrace the flaw . Make jokes about it. We are so lucky just to be here. Don't sweat it. Be brave. There are soooo many ways out that don't involve ending it. I think its so awesome that you are so willing to help other people. I wish the planet was full of people like you. Please don't be afraid to let yourself enjoy something, even if it appears selfish. If everything has got you down and people don't understand, then just do what I do and say "FUCK IT!" Not to other people! Just inside your head and smile and laugh. Now you don't have to fix anything.! Of course this isn't a very effective long term thing but it might help occasionally just to help remind you that you have some power and can overcome whatever is trying to hurt you. I would be pleased if you could continue to communicate with me and the people here. We also suffer and you absolutely are not alone in this world. I have recently forced myself to attend a yoga group that includes guided meditation and deep breathing exercises. I don't have much money but it has been worth every penny to feel some relief from myself. My faith is personal but the way i feel relaxed for the rest of the day is beyond what any doctor can do or what i can do for myself. I'm not certified in anything, but I can relate on every level about ending it. I look forward to reading your response!
-chrisW

lost,feeling like all is going down hill so fast.I cry and until I end up feeling sick and having a headache.marriage falling apart,kids who really arent kids thier 19 and 20.I feel like I have given so much to everyone.I feel I cant give anymore.My heart feels so broken.It hurts.I have so many disorders and I cant fight anymore.I have never been a quitter,and I don't like quitters.But I have decided to just let whatever happens,just happen!Kathy

Just hang on for the ride. The pain will subside. I can only imagine how it feels. You are not a quitter. You are stronger than you realize already by just talking about it. Your children need and want you in their lives no matter how much it doesn't seem like it sometimes.You are so blessed to have them. I only wish I had children of my own. I'm not sure when or if it will ever happen. My conditions were bad today but I decided to feel happy anyways. I know its beyond my control and so its not my fault. Its not your fault either. Just negative forces trying to control you and deceive you. Don't let it.

Thanks,I am hanging on.

kathy is your husband supportive or does he make it worse your kids still need you even though they are older i have a 21 yr old special needs daughter and if it wasnt for her i would have been gone a long time ago i cant hold on much longer i am trying to get her in a group home so i know she will be ok i am planning to end things this summer i felt so alone last night and all i needed was a hug and had no one i want to help you before i am gone take care and chris thank you for the advice especially about who cares what others think the yoga i heard it helps i did it years ago when i was in the psych ward i would try again but it is too late for me i also want to help you any way i can