Mother of a 21yr. old "Special Needs" daughter just diagnosed with HL ..Info Please

My 21 yr. old daughter was diagnosed with HL. She just had a pet scan, blood work, Neck biopsy, bone marrow biopsy, echocardiogram. Pulmonary function will be done on Wednesday. The biopsy's will let us know what stage etc.We meet withthe oncologist on Tuesday. He did say she shoud have a port and he indicated to me that it would be 12 chemo treatments followed by radiation. He said she would loose her hair.
My husband and I are very strong and we will see our daughter thru this BUT she is special needs. She does not understand what is in store for her. When we told her about the neck biopsy, she paniced for days so now we feel the less she knows (up front) the better.
My question is when does the hair fall out. I took my daughter wig sng and we made very light of it. But I keep hearing "you should shave her head before the first chemo". I think that is going to upset her even more. She has long, beautiful- never been bleached - hair. I had tried to look into donating it but it may not be long enough. DOES ANYONE HAVE A SUGGESTION ON HOW TO HANDLE THE HAIR ISSUE? Should we cut it short and ater her 1st chemo shave her head. I have been told that she should not have long hair when she starts to loose it becaue it is very tramic .
2ND Question-----How will she feel with the chemo treatments. Are you exhausted for the first few days following treatment and then bounce back a litle?
I know some are nauseau and some not.
This site is wonderful because I can get a response from
people that have actually gone thru this. I am numb and
heartbroken, please tell me what is in store for us
Mary Anne