my recent melt down

I have been holding back tears,anger,frustration,and hurt for months now.I guess I just simply didn't want to face them.My daughter turning her back on me taking my grandson with her.The court I was to face against false charges she had made on me.Then a marriage in desperate need of help.Plus had one daughter married at home with an infant and a teenage daughter depending on me too.The house work was just overwheming it seemed like.Someone was always finding something to complain about.I was always needed for help in ever way I turned.I tried doing things as a treat for myself.I still never really dealt with the issues until yesterday.I made it a point to myself I was gonna take time to grieve,take time to cry,and deal with this marriage.I'm trying to give my husband a chance.He's seeking outside help to get things together for us.If that don't work with some time I have to move on with my life.I know everyone here can take care of them selves I do what I feel up to but know more.I have realized I pushed my own self over the edge.I got so ill yesterday I got in awhole nother state of mind.I did not even know myself.I was hostle and angry.I blew up on my sister and her husband.I was daring them for a fight.They must have been shocked.They had a million dollar surprise look on their faces.I snapped on my mom.I went off on my husband.I was clearly looking for a fight.I been wanting to just hit or throw something.I even had thaughts of being worthless and not needing to be around anymore.I'm not planning on harming myself or anyone else.I just need to learn how to gradually let things out instead of letting them build up as they are now.I have to admitt I was clearly out of line yesterday with alot of people.I talked to my mom today.She said It was expected for me to lose it at some point.I just had to much to deal with on me.I'd like to say all clear i'm better but thats not true.I still feel the urge to blow.I'm still very hurt and angry.I just want all this drama to go away.I been just really grieveing like my child has died while the ones who love me most just sit back say nothing.I know they may care and just not know what to say.It still would be nice for my husband to hold me close confirm our relationship.Maybe even others confirm their relationship.It would be nice just to get a hug or affirmation.Instead its like life goes on nothing wrong.Its do this do that help me here help me there.I can't even help myself.I been just barely hanging on.I been allowing others to drive me over too.I feel like somethings just snapped inside.I hope somebody has some suggestions on away to grieve rather than holding it in.That truely about ended me and hurt others feelings.