May 17, 2012
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Dealing with the Thought of your Soon to be Ex-Wife with another Man
My name is Jimmy, I'm 32 and I just got out of prison. My wife, who had trust issues from years past (minor ones with me, bigger issuses from before she met me) was devasted that I was doing things behind her back (starting fires, taking pills). I believe now that I have been depressed my whole life and that I was channeling my depresson in other ways. The point is, after 18 months of thinking about what she wants and if she could get past what I had done to her, she decided that she couldn't. She has claimed to forgive me for what I did, but does not believe she can trust me again and thus has moved on and found a new guy.
I didn't truly realize how bad her leaving me would hit till this first week out and knowing she is seeing someone else is a torturus thought. I mean, she was all mine...now I'm just a "friend"...as if I can just be friends with her, no problems. As if I won't be thinking about her and him everytime I see or talk to her.
I'm tired of bursting into tears at a moments notice.
By Mtmike79 on Sat, 05-22-10, 20:44
Wise words Ross! I will take them to heart in my own situation, I am about to get a divorce with my wife of 27 years and I have a hard time thinking of being friends with her right now. I didn't want a divorce with out giving our marriage another try.
By Ross on Mon, 05-24-10, 00:04
Mike-
Divorce after 27 years, that's got to be hard and I'm sorry for your sake. Is your marriage ending relatively amicably? I mean is there a reason to think you can be friends in the future?
Ross
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Jimmy-
Your situation sucks, sorry to read about it. The only thing I can tell you is that you are best off not being friends with her right now. Not for a while. You say how bad it'll be every time you "see or talk to her" which is reason enough to do neither, for now. I suppose if you have kids it won't be that easy but the less you see or hear of her, the better. If you're to stay friends, you'll become friends again down the road. Otherwise, for your own sake, cut her out.
Ross