May 16, 2012 | Subscribe

I feel like it's my fault all the time

I hate living with my constant anxiety. I feel like all of the negative things that keep happening are my fault. I know I shouldn't put all the blame on me, but I can't help it. I worry myself and I get all worked up over the verbal abuse that my father inflicts. It's hard for me to let go and to move on. It's something that I know I have to do in order to become a stronger person. I have friends who I can turn to and an amazing boyfriend who is willing to listen. I know I must sound selfish, but having people around doesn't feel like it's enough. I need to work on fighting my inner anxieties and my worries. I need to realize that I'm a better person that what my father thinks I am and I need to learn to let go and live in the moment, instead of dwelling in the past. I know my journey to becoming a genuinely happier person is far from reaching it's end. I hope I can better along the way.

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By mRayk on Mon, 06-21-10, 10:42

I know how it is. I was diagnosed with general and social anxiety or something that my case manager and doctor said.
It is extremly hard living with anxiety and coping with it daily. Deep breathing and "going to your happy place" helps calm down anxiety.
I also have problems letting go and moving on. But things in the past are ment to be let go, just talk about it and then let it go. I know it is REALLY hard.
That is great you have friends and a bf that are willing to listen, talk to them and tell them about things that you can't let go of.
It's not selfish, it seems like you need more help, like professional help. Maybe see a therapist and a psychiatrist to get your anxiety under control.
I still dwell on the past and I know a lot of how you feel, there are many people that have problems letting go of the past, it is super normal.
Getting help would be the best option right now (:
Get better.

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By mariekiap on Fri, 09-30-11, 02:57

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By Daz1gurl on Fri, 09-30-11, 13:08

Hi. Yes I agree with you completely because I have constant anxiety myself. In fact about 5, 6, or 7 years ago when I was in high school I had to deal with my father who was constantly bickering about my life and that I should be doing this and that. I still feel that today. Like I am always anxious and I feel like I have to defend myself for everything I do. Its like there is nothing that I do that will please the person who I want to please.
So anyways I see what you mean because I have been there, and I am still there at 23 years old. I have a mild case of anxiety that I got from my mother and grandfather. The best advice that I can give you, which I need to give myself is to just do whatever it is that feels right you. And let me know if you need someone (me) to help you through this. Because I am sure I need to myself.

Chelsea L.

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